On the edge of something stupid

April 05, 2017
Do you ever find yourself about to make a kind of stupid decision but are still convinced it's the right one to make? 

Maybe not stupid, scary perhaps, about to take a plunge, a risk. I'm about to move away from my university, for the second time. The first was disastrous for my thesis, so it feels like a horrible decision to do it again, and yet I still think it might be the right one to make.

Feels like I'm standing on the edge, about to make a leap of faith... in myself

I had to restart my Master's thesis when I came back from Germany because my original adviser had decided not to work with me, but only told me when I told him I was moving back. I had a bunch of other professors (including a Committee Member) tell me that my thesis was fine and ready to go, but my adviser refused to give me real any feedback, and just stringing me along. I was overjoyed at finding a new adviser, but he's unresponsive frequently, just like the last one. He was on sabbatical the first year I was working with him, and this semester he's also out of touch often. Not really his fault, sometimes it's just him and his iPhone out on a mountain against the world, and he can't really type a lengthily reply.

I've been back over a year and a half, but still I haven't had any luck at being a full-time student. I always seems you get pushed to the back burner, and if it was any other kind of relationship I would have left it. I also don't have anywhere to work on campus, and the only computer I have with any pep is a desktop, so I'm working from my apartment either way.

So where does that leave me? I still want to finish it but right now I'm spending so much time waiting for other people get back to me and I feel like I'm just wasting my time on them. My husband recently got a job and Philadelphia and we would like to move closer to his work so he doesn't have an hour long commute.

The question I have now is too I try to find a job in Philadelphia and start my career again again or do I stick it out as a full-time student just in case my adviser becomes more active?

What's the right sensible practical decision. I feel like you can't go wrong with finishing a degree and you can't go wrong with getting a job, either. However, I've already tried once to work away from my University and finish my degree and it was a disaster. but I also don't feel like that was my fault, I mean, I wrote the damn thing after all.

When I moved to Germany, I tool a risk and bet on myself, on my abilities to get my thesis done, and it didn't work out. Is it stupid to make that same bet again?

No comments:

Powered by Blogger.